Am I Retaining My Wife’s Respect?

Nick Grande
Genesis 12:9-14 “And there was a famine in the land: and Abram went down into Egypt to sojourn there; for the famine was grievous in the land. And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou art a fair woman to look upon: Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This is his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive. Say, I pray thee, thou art my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee.”


We often will hear Pastor say jokingly something along these lines, “You may think you are spiritual but let’s ask your wife what she thinks.” The line always makes for a good laugh, but let’s be honest in how true it is. If there is one person who really knows who we are and what we believe, is it not our spouse and our family?


I recently read this passage in Genesis, and I was so convicted with this thought. God led Abram to uproot his family and leave his homeland. God promised to bless and multiply Him in doing so. But in the same chapter we see a failure in the life of Abram. A famine had come upon the land and Abram decided to take his family to Egypt. Upon entering the city, he turns to his wife and lays out a deceitful scheme. Abram knew his wife was beautiful, and that the men of Egypt would desire her for her beauty. He feared that they would kill him to attain her. Because of this Abram tells his wife to lie and say that they were siblings and not married. She agreed and went through with the lie. Pharaoh took her, God plagued Pharaoh, and Abram’s deception was revealed.


God blessed Abram with a great wife, one that was willing to leave her home and follow him into the wilderness. She even obeyed in him in his selfish deception. Amidst her submission to her husband, I really wonder what was going through her mind in what she thought about her husband. I can only imagine that this selfish decision made by Abram hurt Sarai’s respect for him as well as diminished her trust in the Lord’s providence. He trusted God enough to uproot his family and head into an unknown land, but when it came down to a life and death situation for Abram, he buckled before his wife and his lack of faith was revealed.


I have the great privilege of being a husband and father as well as the role of leading my wife and home spiritually. My wife and my children are observing my faith in God. Will I trust Him when life poses a great risk? Or will I buckle under the pressure and send the message to them that we only trust God in the little areas but in the areas that pose a great risk, it’s okay to bend the rules to attain our selfish agenda.


This thought has convicted me greatly and has opened my eyes to small areas in my life where I could possibly be chipping away at the spiritual respect my wife might have for me. God forbid the day comes in my life that I would be like Lot where when I come before my family with a spiritual matter that they think I am mocking them because I have lost all spiritual respect and influence.


May we as husbands and fathers retain or reestablish our position and role in our home as the spiritual leaders. When I talk about God to my family, I want them to know that I know Him and that His working is evident in my life.

Nick Grande

Bro Grande serves in our music and media ministry, and teaches the Solid Rock Singles Class. He and his wife Hannah have two daughters, Allison and Brooke.

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